I have a hard time starting projects and habits. I tend to blank out when it’s time to start anything, really. I will sit there with a pen in hand and a fresh journal, not knowing what my first stroke should be. Literally, I have sat there and considered what should happen with a new journal. “Do I start with ‘I?’ Is that too selfish, am I not being humble? Wait, it’s my journal, how can I be selfish if I write ‘I?’” That’s just one example.
I’ve been toying with the idea of learning calligraphy as a new practice in mindfulness. Starting, however, is the main thing holding me back. I have to find a new time slot for my practice, decide how much time that I want to dedicate to it and order all of my materials for learning. Then I wonder about how awful my calligraphy will look. I wonder if my hands will shake too much because, like with journals, what if I’m afraid of my first brush stroke? I know that it’s silly to let little thoughts prevent us from doing things in life, but sometimes they get the better of us.
My single-card reading for the Faeries’ Oracle reveals why we have these road blocks. Enter G. Hobyah. The first thing that I thought of when I drew this card were the Fieries’ from the movie, the Labyrinth. This should come as no surprise, Brian Froud helped to develop the magical creatures found in the Labyrinth, which the Jim Henson Creature Workshop then brought to life.
The Fieries’ were dead set on removing Sarah’s head, presenting an actual threat to her life. G. Hobyah, however, presents only imagined threats. His job is to parade as all the little fears that create huge hang-ups for our endeavors. While this may seem mean and unnecessary, he assures us that it’s for our own good. Will we let something small and insignificant stop us from reaching our goals? Rather, will we question why these small fears bother us and look inside of ourselves to see where that fear originated?
By looking inward, we have the opportunity to not just take a small breath and push ourselves, but to release the fear completely and never be bothered by it again. G. Hobyah shows us our fears and teaches us to get to the root of them and remove them. This way, we can focus on the task ahead and assess threats rationally without our imaginations making them worse. Instead feeling like we may fail at an endeavor, which in turn keeps us from pursuing it, we can get started and deal with failure, if failure occurs at all.
For me, this means that I have no excuse to put off calligraphy practice. It also means that I need to look within myself and discover why starting projects is difficult for me. Think about things that you’re unnecessarily afraid of and figure where it all began. You might be surprised at the origins and realize that it’s time to let it go so that you can continue moving forward in life.